Monday, November 07, 2005
Bowl Eligible…
I was reading this morning about how with one more win BYU becomes Bowl Eligible. Are you serious? Have college football fans become so desperate for a bowl game that we allow most teams a chance to “go to a bowl game”? Maybe we have too many bowl games if a team must only win a whopping six games to become bowl eligible. It used to be that bowl games were reserved for conference champions and or top 20 teams. Now any team capable of winning six games can be picked for a bowl game. BYU is flirting with that sixth win with 2 games remaining vs. Wyoming and instate rival Utah.
I don’t believe for a single instant BYU should be picked for a bowl game. BYU isn’t on the radar of any poll but the Fox Sports poll who ranks them as #78. Lets recap our season thus far.
Game 1: Boston College gives us a nice thumping 20-3. BYU continues its end zone phobia. paging Dr. Phil… BYU needs you. Where the hell is Dr. Phil?
Game 2: BYU welcomes the high school team of Eastern Illinois. Who in the hell schedules a division II A team for a game? Was this Gary Crowton trying to save his job? BYU of course wins 45-10. Eastern Illinois has an enrollment of less than 8000 students. I give huge ups for any IIA school that has the testicular fortitude to come to Provo and play. Oh and Oregon is doing great with Crowton.
Game 3: BYU blows a 21-point lead in the 4th and ends up losing to TCU. TCU suddenly has become ranked in the top 20. BYU DEFENSE or lack there of squanders a nice 3 td lead in the 4th with 2 td passes of over 35 yards. Pass defense ranks dead last…
Game 4: Beats Colorado State… who almost beat #25 Colorado but every other team they have played has a nice losing record.
Game 5: San Diego St Aztecs eat fresh cougar meat. 31-10. BYU melt down in Cali. It was even uglier than the score indicates. After this pathetic effort Lavelle Edwards contemplates calling BYU to have his name removed from the stadium.
Game 6: BYU visits South Bend for a nice refresher course on humble pie. Granted BYU played well for almost 2 quarters before the appearance of Dr. Jekyll. Bronco Mendenhall calls Arnold Friberg and asks him to paint a Mormon version of touchdown Jesus.
Game 7: BYU manhandles Air Force who seems to be struggling with a nice losing record vs. nobody opponents.
Game 8: BYU beats UNLV who is 2-7 but yet Bronco plays John Beck the whole game despite being up by 34 points. I guess the fear of a TCU like collapse was ever present.
On a Related Note:
While reading the BYU athletic page I stumbled upon the Cougar Cheerleader page. I had no idea the entertainment value of their site. I became quite enlighted.
“Imagine an athletic team consisting of both women and men athletes who practice weekdays for the sole purpose of enhancing the efforts of other athletic teams.”
It makes the cheerleaders seem like Viagra. Maybe they should have a warning on their page. If athletic efforts last for more than 4 hours please consult your physician.
“The BYU Cheer Squad supports men's and women's NCAA sports. Squad members are expected to promote student participation in University activities, enrich relationships with the community, and uphold the standards set forth by Brigham Young University and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”
This quote made me laugh also since the photos clearly show outfits that wouldn’t be allowed on BYU campus due to the honor code. I guess its better that one squad dwindle in unbelief rather than one football team fail to be bowl eligible.
Cheerleader “Mission Statement:
As representative of Brigham Young University and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we will bring others unto Christ through our talents, attitudes and services.”
I can’t tell you how many sinners cheerleaders have converted. Maybe we could lower Utah's record level of convicted sex offenders?
Cheer Squad Quick Facts
True Freshmen: 5
What the hell is a true freshman? Someone who is in his or her first freshman year? Someone who has no AP credit?
Average Female Weight: 104 lbs.
This is a very important stat to publish… We all know that a chubby cheerleaders is as popular as an IED in Iraq.
The Cheer Squad cheers for; football, woman's volleyball, men's basketball, and women's basketball.
I guess this means the other 20 sports teams are screwed on their “athletic enhancements”.
I was reading this morning about how with one more win BYU becomes Bowl Eligible. Are you serious? Have college football fans become so desperate for a bowl game that we allow most teams a chance to “go to a bowl game”? Maybe we have too many bowl games if a team must only win a whopping six games to become bowl eligible. It used to be that bowl games were reserved for conference champions and or top 20 teams. Now any team capable of winning six games can be picked for a bowl game. BYU is flirting with that sixth win with 2 games remaining vs. Wyoming and instate rival Utah.
I don’t believe for a single instant BYU should be picked for a bowl game. BYU isn’t on the radar of any poll but the Fox Sports poll who ranks them as #78. Lets recap our season thus far.
Game 1: Boston College gives us a nice thumping 20-3. BYU continues its end zone phobia. paging Dr. Phil… BYU needs you. Where the hell is Dr. Phil?
Game 2: BYU welcomes the high school team of Eastern Illinois. Who in the hell schedules a division II A team for a game? Was this Gary Crowton trying to save his job? BYU of course wins 45-10. Eastern Illinois has an enrollment of less than 8000 students. I give huge ups for any IIA school that has the testicular fortitude to come to Provo and play. Oh and Oregon is doing great with Crowton.
Game 3: BYU blows a 21-point lead in the 4th and ends up losing to TCU. TCU suddenly has become ranked in the top 20. BYU DEFENSE or lack there of squanders a nice 3 td lead in the 4th with 2 td passes of over 35 yards. Pass defense ranks dead last…
Game 4: Beats Colorado State… who almost beat #25 Colorado but every other team they have played has a nice losing record.
Game 5: San Diego St Aztecs eat fresh cougar meat. 31-10. BYU melt down in Cali. It was even uglier than the score indicates. After this pathetic effort Lavelle Edwards contemplates calling BYU to have his name removed from the stadium.
Game 6: BYU visits South Bend for a nice refresher course on humble pie. Granted BYU played well for almost 2 quarters before the appearance of Dr. Jekyll. Bronco Mendenhall calls Arnold Friberg and asks him to paint a Mormon version of touchdown Jesus.
Game 7: BYU manhandles Air Force who seems to be struggling with a nice losing record vs. nobody opponents.
Game 8: BYU beats UNLV who is 2-7 but yet Bronco plays John Beck the whole game despite being up by 34 points. I guess the fear of a TCU like collapse was ever present.
On a Related Note:
While reading the BYU athletic page I stumbled upon the Cougar Cheerleader page. I had no idea the entertainment value of their site. I became quite enlighted.
“Imagine an athletic team consisting of both women and men athletes who practice weekdays for the sole purpose of enhancing the efforts of other athletic teams.”
It makes the cheerleaders seem like Viagra. Maybe they should have a warning on their page. If athletic efforts last for more than 4 hours please consult your physician.
“The BYU Cheer Squad supports men's and women's NCAA sports. Squad members are expected to promote student participation in University activities, enrich relationships with the community, and uphold the standards set forth by Brigham Young University and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”
This quote made me laugh also since the photos clearly show outfits that wouldn’t be allowed on BYU campus due to the honor code. I guess its better that one squad dwindle in unbelief rather than one football team fail to be bowl eligible.
Cheerleader “Mission Statement:
As representative of Brigham Young University and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we will bring others unto Christ through our talents, attitudes and services.”
I can’t tell you how many sinners cheerleaders have converted. Maybe we could lower Utah's record level of convicted sex offenders?
Cheer Squad Quick Facts
True Freshmen: 5
What the hell is a true freshman? Someone who is in his or her first freshman year? Someone who has no AP credit?
Average Female Weight: 104 lbs.
This is a very important stat to publish… We all know that a chubby cheerleaders is as popular as an IED in Iraq.
The Cheer Squad cheers for; football, woman's volleyball, men's basketball, and women's basketball.
I guess this means the other 20 sports teams are screwed on their “athletic enhancements”.
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