Making a Mockery

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Utah HB 322 and Other Silly Utah Legislation

Utah HB 322

What I love about the Utah political process is the ridiculousness of it all? Utah government must protect us from ourselves. This legislative season has a lot of bad laws. One of my favorites is the law that has been proposed to require me to turn on my headlights any time I turn my windshield wipers on. Does this include when I use the windshield washer function? I guess after a hundred years of the automobile we have become too dumb to understand that in low visibility times we need to turn on our headlights. Pretty soon I will have a car that auto-magically turns on my lights with the windshield wiper switch. I guess it will be “ergonomic”. Maybe we can turn on everything in the car with one switch and remove all personalization of the switch choices? How ever this isn’t Utah HB 322.

Utah HB 322 is even more important. HB 322 will require all driver education students to write a 10 page paper about a teenager killed in a car wreck. Does this mean there is a serious shortage in Utah of obituary writers? Nope… It is due to the tragedy of Rep. Aaron Tilton, R-Springville who lost a niece in a terrible car accident in Hobble Creek Canyon. I feel bad for his loss but this accident has been very high profile due to the incredible stupidity by the parents and the driver. Lets allow our barely 16 year old to drive a high end 2006 Mustang GT (read very fast), cram it full of 6 kids and then race at high speeds down a very narrow road that winds and twists like a tightly coiled snake.

So it is no longer ok to show films in drivers ed like “Red Asphalt” but it will be better to force them to write a paper on the death of a teen? I was no saint behind the wheel of a car. I raced, I did stupid things, young people take risks, but I just don’t understand how Tilton thinks this will prevent deaths. Why not include in this bill a 10 page paper for the following: Smoking, alcohol & drug use, bulimia, or sticking your tongue in an electrical outlet these are all things that can kill you. Writing a paper won’t fix the problem.

Where my problem lies is with Utah lawmakers making up stupid laws just because the can. This is a stupid law. There is no evidence that this project would lower teen automobile death rates. If they want to make a difference require more time in drivers ed, raise the age at which teens can drive. My point is kids due stupid things. It was with in days of getting my drivers license that I took my parents car well over 100 mph (I won’t say how far but it was a ways) back when the speed limit was still 55.

Tilton’s other bill: HB 33: Harmful material to minors must be covered when displayed in stores. I am totally against porn but sometimes I think Utah is just a rule or two short of the town from the movie “Footloose”. Why can’t people do what I do and just not shop places they find offensive? If a magazine cover offends you tell the manager and shop elsewhere. Its been more than 10 years that Macey’s Supermarkets started covering magazines because of complaints. We don’t need a law to legislate morality. These are the same lawmakers that can pass any sort of ethics reform yet want to tell me what is morally acceptable.

Also I am glad to see my favorite moron Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan is back. You may have remembered him from some of the classic bills like the one trying to ban evolution from being taught in Utah schools or the forced inclusion of Creation in science. He is in rare form and continues to push religious agendas while being a total blankety blank blanker with his SB 111, Free Exercise of Religion Without Government Interference, Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan. Has Chris not ever read a link thing that was put out a while back called The Bill of Rights? This document protects things like religious freedoms and free speech.

Don’t get me wrong. I am a very religious person. I am active LDS. I believe in creation, I believe that pornography is destroying lives, I also believe that our civilization is crumbling due to the weight of poor choices and failure to follow God but I also believe in free agency and ones ability to choose legal activities. I don’t think that the LDS majority in Utah should be making laws to force beliefs, way of life or the promotion of only LDS values despite the fact that if more of these values were followed we would have a better society.

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Sunday, January 28, 2007

Press This!

Recently the Men’s Tennis was down under for the Australian Open. After losing to the number 1 ranked Roger Federer, Andy Roddick gave a classic performance at his press conference. We have all seen the media pound away at everyone asking dumb question after dumb question. We have seen stars not answer, walk away, berate and even get angry with the press. In this instance Andy Roddick gives a hilarious performance with the press. Enjoy. By the way Federer owns Roddick to the tune of 10-1. My favorite part is when someone asks about strategy talk with his coach and he says some thing to the effect of well we didn’t discuss strategies about being down 6-2 or 4-0 or etc. Kudos Andy for not letting the bastards get you down.

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Thursday, January 25, 2007

Quote of the Day

"I can't see it happening somehow -- we don't airbrush to that extent." Hugh Heffner on Kelly Osbourne's desire to appear in Playboy.

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

It's True..

Dumb people cause more accidents because they are more prone to accidents according to a British study. Lower IQs in Childhood Linked to Accident-Prone Adulthood.

My wife will be relived that I am not really being a jerk by saying things like what are you an idiot to get hurt like that. It turns out it's not their fault its just a fact of being dumb. I personally believed my whole life that dumbasses cause accidents. I have finally been validated by science.

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Monday, January 08, 2007

T I Double GRRRR Sucker Punches Junior

I love lawyers who chase big money targets like the leaches they are. NOT! Check out this video. Allegedly Tigger sucker punches this teen. It appears that there was some contact but in all the video I have seen it appears to be teen play but not according to this father who seeks damages. So why do I despise this video and this huckster of a cheesy lawyer? It’s blatant targeting of a billion dollar corporation. Who appears on every national morning news show with their attorney who says nothing? The father uses inflammatory language like its just been a nightmare since this happened on Saturday… The father is obviously well coached by an ambulance chaser. My favorite part was when they asked how the boy was feeling he says a little sore but no pain but that is due to medications that were given to me. What a scam?

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