Making a Mockery

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

The lighter side of Seriousness

Recently an ex Sundance employee sent me this gem. I found it amusing and thought I would pass it on.

How many HR employees does it take to change a light bulb?

One unless it’s a celebrity owned resort in Utah County and then it takes four. One to change the light bulb, one to micromanage the project, one to do all the paperwork and one well we all wonder what the hell she does.

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Monday, August 22, 2005

Rocky Anderson: Don’t Go Away Mad Just Go Away…
For me January 2008 will not come soon enough. Mayor Rocky “No Spine” Anderson will not seek a third term. Thank God. I am tired of seeing Anderson screwing around with Salt Lake Politics.

My favorite Rockyism was his weak and often side changing, side stepping position on Salt Lake’s Main Street Plaza. Lets sell some property to the LDS Church and then tell them what they can do with it after they have signed a deal. Lets join the ACLU in pointless civil actions wasting everyones time and money. As a side note: Anderson spent many years as a lawyer in Salt Lake City, specializing in civil litigation and was president of the local ACLU chapter. Can you say conflict of Interest?

Lately Mayor Rocky “No Spine” Anderson, a Democrat, has called on anti-war activists and Democrats to conduct "the biggest demonstration this state has ever seen.'' . Our band wagon jumper has found another cause to boost his popularity. However I am repulsed by a public servant going after another public servant in such a manner. Today you either like the President or you don’t. Everyone is entitled to their opinions but stirring up hate isn’t a thing a mayor should do. Rocky in an e-mail Wednesday to about 10 activist leaders, the maverick mayor of Utah's capital called for a diverse demonstration to greet Bush. Its nice that Rocky has grown a spine now that he isn’t running for another term. I think that Anderson has been spending too many nights with Bob at Sundance. Anderson used these tired and worn phrases to justify his plight "Our beef is not with the military, it's with the president and his administration. We all need to support our troops. They're doing the very best they can, they're putting all on the line as they have since the country's founding, and we need to be grateful for that.'' We support you but we don’t support your mission. What a slap in the face… to those who volunteered to be in our military. So when do we start screaming Baby Killers just like in Vietnam?

Maybe the President lied about his reasons for going to Iraq, maybe he really thought there were WMD’s or that Iraq posed a threat, no one knows for sure but now that we are there we need to stay the course. We must leave the new Iraq with a stable government. Leaving a power vacuum in Iraq is not a solution. Leaving Iraq is begging for an Islamic Extremist Government who we will fight again. Not too mention giving them the ability to choose their destiny is the greatest gift we could give them. Where would the United States be without the help of France when we were fighting for freedom?

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Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Terrell Owens Idiot Extraordinaire:
Unless you have been in outer space for the past month or so you should be well aware of the unfair contract Terrell Owens is trapped in. In case you have been out, I will recap it for you. Last year Owens signed a slave labor 7 year $48.97 million dollar contract. After one year Owens would like to renegotiate his deal because “it is unfair” and “it’s not about the money but making sure his family is taken care of”. First off I am sure that it is tough to support a family on $49 million. I mean my wife and I only made $60k last year so I can really relate to the struggle of Owens. Who doesn’t starve when you only make $437,000 a game or almost $8000 a minute during a 16 game season?

First off I would like to thank the Eagles organization for giving Owens the proverbial middle finger. Not renegotiating, not releasing, not trading, not allowing this to distract the team and sending Owens home for bad behavior is awesome. Finally an injection of intelligence from an NFL organization when handling spoiled stars. According to MSN, “Philadelphia president Joe Banner has said Owens won’t return with the new contract he wants and they don’t want it continuing to disrupt the team.” Andy Reid has become my NFL hero for sending T.O. home for some cooling off time.

So you are probably wondering why Terrell is an idiot? So far I have only written about his greed. Greed is nothing new in sports. Why is T.O. and idiot? Owens is an idiot because of several reasons. Owens could have been the hero by keeping his mouth shut and negotiating behind the scenes. By whining to the public Owens had already lost his battle. Average Joe can’t understand how $49 million is unfair. Taking his problem public wasn’t the solution. Showing up to camp was a start but it has since spiraled out of control. Owens has badmouthed just about everyone on the team and everyone in the organization. How is this going to win financial stability for your family? Owens has lost favor with the public, he is losing favor with his teammates and is losing his battle to redo his deal, in addition he is losing out on a future deal with other teams. That’s right folks Owens is killing his future earning power.

Owens is killing his golden goose one feather pluck at a time. No team on the planet is going to want to deal with a spoiled star that rips teams apart faster than carrots in a veg-a-matic. Lets remember back 2 years ago to San Francisco… It seems like only yesterday Owens was an angry 49er. Terrell didn’t think the 49ers wanted him because of his “bad contract”, so he demanded a trade. In the process of getting a trade, Owens alienated 49ers head coach Steve Mariucci and trashed talked his then quarterback Jeff Garcia. Both Mariucci and Garcia left town and Owens eventually got his trade albeit to Baltimore. Owens whined about the Ravens and was instead traded to the Eagles. Owens has now done a similar thing in Philly. Owens has whined about his unfair contract, ostracized his teammate Donavan McNabb and angered his coaches. All while his agent Rosenhaus claims “Terrell doesn’t have an option. He’s very unhappy with his situation. He’s very uncomfortable, and it’s a tough situation for him. He’s an emotional person, a great competitor, and he’s in an unfair contract.” Now what team is going to see this entire circus and go boy we should go out and get Owens. In 4 short years Owens has whined his way into a corner. The Eagles are not going to let him go. The Eagles may release him next year but few teams will have room salary cap wise to trade for him or pick him up and if one team is crazy enough too how long will it take Owens to dismantle the next team. Owens has in quick fashion managed to ruin working relationships with two people known for their class, Reid and McNabb. If clashing with these two class acts is possible just think of what Owens could really do to lesser men. No trade, no free agency and no options is what is going to kill Owens.

Can Owens recover from the infection of his mouth? Owens could be successful if he would shut his big mouth. T.O. needs to go and mend fences with Reid and with McNabb. Owens also needs to put in a tremendous team effort and be on his best behavior. Owens needs to win fans back. If Owens does his best and rebuilds broken bridges, I think that he could get a better contract soon or at least be traded to that new contract. I don’t believe that Terrell will do what it takes. His ego and mouth are the downfall of someone with hall of fame talent.

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Monday, August 15, 2005

Genealogy while not my favorite thing to do can be very interesting. According to relatives, my ancestry can be traced directly to pilgrims on the Mayflower, who left Europe to create a better life. These brave souls begat heroes who crossed the Delaware with George Washington on Christmas Eve for freedom in a new country. Later more relatives answered the call joining the North in the Civil War; one even becoming a Union Colonel spending years suffering in Andersonville Prison, where almost 13,000 died from disease, poor sanitation, malnutrition, overcrowding, or exposure to the elements. More descendants crossed the United States searching for freedom and finding a truth. Eventually both my grandfathers fought in World War II, one of them being stationed at Peal Harbor on that fateful day in December 1941.

In today’s world, we lack heroes and to me, these men and woman are heroes. These unique individuals gave up all that they had in the pursuit of a better tomorrow. All of these brave souls gave up their “me and mine” for future generations. Without taking a chance on the Mayflower, I might not be an American, not fighting for freedom I could have been ruled by a King, not preserving for the Union and battling for freedom we might not be the United States, not crossing the continent in pursuit of dreams I might not be a Californian, not aiding allies I might be a native Japanese speaker. I walk in freedom in my native United States because my ancestors were brave, heroic souls who gave their best for a better tomorrow. I am truly grateful for their sacrifice.

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Wednesday, August 10, 2005

The Daily Herald Letters to the Editor

Parking lot enforcers put profit above patriotism

For the past 12 years, my family and I have attended the Fourth of July parade in Provo.
This year, we enjoyed the parade from our usual spot in front of the Elms Apartments.
At the conclusion, we dutifully stuffed all of our trash in our garbage bags; we placed it, along with our blankets, into the back of our vehicle, when suddenly we spotted a red sign on our window. I was shocked. I looked down again at the glaring red paper. I read, "University Parking Enforcement ... $50 fine, booted at 9:10 a.m." They had booted my car while I stood as the honor guard passed our spot. I had my son hurry and call the number. We waited and about half an hour later the man showed up. He slyly smiled, "Would you like to pay this with a credit card?"

I did my best to hold it in, but could not keep in my frustration, and I said, "The Fourth of July? I can understand before or even after the parade, but during?"

"Yep." Shame on University Parking Enforcement, and shame on the Elms Apartments for allowing enforcement during this time.

Ronald Tanner,

The stupidity of the average Utah County Resident never ceases to astound me.

Who doesn’t know that Provo is the towing capital of Utah.

You park on private property that I am sure was clearly marked or else they cannot tow or boot cars

Nice Example for your kids… Break the law and try to get away with it.

Everyone knows that God Giveth and BYU taketh away liberally. Whine publicly about breaking the law getting caught and paying for your crime.

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Monday, August 08, 2005

Signs You Might Have a Successful Website:

People email you because of flamingly incompetence

You have a French Webstalker

You become a discussion at high-level management meetings

People Google their own names to see if they are mentioned on your site.

Most searchers use the query “hr broom splinters” to find the site

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Friday, August 05, 2005

Special Shout Out to all the Sundance Gawkers...
Thank you to all my Sundance Resort Employees. All your visits over the past 3 days has earned me over $100 in advertising revenue. Keep on visiting and my cruise to the Caribean will be paid for before I know it.

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Thursday, August 04, 2005

Just to be clear to our special Sundance Readers…
Lately I have noticed a lot of traffic from Sundance and to be perfectly clear I am posting this.

I loved working at Sundance. I worked with some of the greatest people and have nothing but the highest praises and respect for most of them. I DID NOT leave bitter and disgruntled. I have no bad/ill feelings for the owner, the company or most of the employees. I am in no way a threat to the safety and well-being of any person, business and or property related to Sundance. I have gone out of my way to make the transition as easy as possible during my departure. I left Sundance for more money and better benefits so that my wife who has some health issues could work less and maybe even quit her job.

Recently I have been asked how do you get mentioned in this blog… Well that is easy…

There are a few methods…
1. Have a cool website or useful information
2. Do something extraordinary
3. Ask to be included (Email works Great)
4. Do something I find amusing, funny or absurd
5. Be a total Jerk

I tend to write about people who have repeatedly gone out of their way to try cause trouble for me over usually very trivial and silly things. For example: One group I have repeatedly written about has done such classic things like blind copy emails, nit-pick the trivial, tattle-tailed on the most strange issues (parking crooked, No I am not kidding), misquoted me benefits where it cost me money and later lied about it when confronted with evidence (I had email proof but somewhere along the line I have misplaced it but I will post it once I find it again), go above and beyond with continually stupid things and once even made me sign a work related disciplinary action.

The story of my write up: Originally they wanted to fire me for this “alleged” offense but my levelheaded and honest boss refused. My charge was surfing inappropriate websites at work (Porn). However when IT manager searched my computer and viewed the Internet logs that I had no access to and couldn’t change or delete there was NO EVIDENCE that supported their claim. The IT manager even wrote on the report that no evidence was found. I refused to sign it and they threatened to fire me so I signed it under protest. I found this charge to be insulting and very disrespectful. I came very close to quitting over it. They challenged my honesty, integrity and my reputation with no real hard evidence. During this witch-hunt I was not allowed to know my accuser nor was I informed when, where and what evidence they had and worst of all I was not able to defend myself. I found out later, some one had filed a complaint saying they witnessed me surfing porn. Having a witness, I find interesting, as it is difficult at best to see my monitor without my knowledge. In addition I know for a fact that other employees who were caught with irrefutable evidence of porn were not disciplined in any way. I do not blame Sundance for this but place the blame squarely on overly zealous HR department. Do I sound angry and bitter about this? Well good because I am still MAD AS HELL about it. This particular group of people continued to single me out whenever possible even up to my last day. To be quite honest I just love to rile them up and give them the grief they give the employees. I hope maybe someday these people will lighten up and become a good resource for the employees instead of being the bane of their existence.

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