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Thursday, October 26, 2006

Stop the Insanity

Last Saturday I as sat peacefully on my couch watching college football (not BYU Football thanks the MTN and an $80 million dollar deal with the Devil) there is a ruffling at my front door. Yes its another bastard placing crap on my door. The dogs are going nuts and barking. Lately I have just had it with door to door salesman and fliers galore on my door. I notice that the young lad is having trouble putting it on my door. Maybe he was slightly intimidated by my sign that says “Absolutely NO SOLICITING and NO FLIERS, or Ads of Kind. THIS MEANS YOU. I WILL CALL YOUR BUSINESS AND ASK YOU TO COME AND REMOVE IT.” Everyday I have to clean off my door and porch of all the ads that have been taped to my door plus all the ones that blow into my doorway. I am sick of it. Anyway… having had enough of this crap on my door, I open the door, as the young man is running away and I shout loudly “Get ‘em”. This is of course; the dogs cue to chase who ever I point at and in this case the violator. It’s a fun trick that my wife and I do to each others to get the poor dogs riled up before we go for a walk or what ever. Its cheap entertainment and the dogs love it. Being well trained they oblige and chase the poor teen to his car… growling and barking. I am mildly amused. For those who are unfamiliar with my two dogs we have a black lab that occasionally barks mostly just sheds and drools and we have a Miniature Toy New Foundland who is Border Collie sized and who growls at inanimate objects but is afraid of everything. For those of you who wonder that I have lost my mind both these dogs are harmless. I knew that the worst they would do is growl. I guess I was secretly hoping the boy would wet himself as retribution for his propaganda.

The ads that this poor teen has left are election pamphlets which remind me that it’s the time of the year I hate, Election Time. It is a time where I get to decipher all the rhetoric of the wealthy morons who think that “they can make a difference” in my life, determine who of the professional liars is the lesser of two evils. I hate it. I am all for making the world a better place but 9.9 times out of 10 politicians don’t make my world a better place. The ad that I am left with is from LaVar Christensen who is running for Congress challenging incumbent (D) Jim Matheson. First off what kind of sick-o names their son LaVar? I won’t judge the candidate based upon his name.

I start to read the ad… This is a big mistake on my part. I start to see some glaring things that I don’t like. (DISCLAIMER) First let me say I am a Republican. I am conservative. I don’t believe in voting the straight ticket nor do I believe in partisanship crap like our party is better or 99% of the political crap that currently goes on. I vote who I honestly think will do the best job. LaVar and his crew left me a six-page pamphlet of pure propaganda. Can we at least disguise it a little?

The first thing that offended me was a picture of his family.

LaVar Christensen Family Photo

It’s not that families offend me. It’s not even that his family offends me, they don’t really but how does a picture of his extended family in the Holiday 2006 Card photo make me want to vote for him? I think it’s a tad too pretentious. First off they are posed in front of a huge fireplace. Hmmm this screams I am a rich SOB with a huge house. Oh yeah all of us are wearing $150 Ralph Lauren shirts and most likely I/We have no real understanding of the plight of the average Utahan. What marketing genius thought hey lets put this years Holiday card photo on your campaign literature (yes I know that this is a stretch)?

In this lame document, LaVar bashes the Democrats for all things Democrat for three of the 6-pages. This offends me not because the Democrats are right, wrong or whatever. It offends me because it is dirty politics of the lowest kind. It’s kind of like making fun the mentally challenged for being mentally challenged. Can you explain why LaVar bothered to print a full paragraph bashing (CA-D) Nancy Pelosi? After all there is nothing that a Utah resident can do about her. No where in his ad does LaVar Christensen lay out his beliefs, his goals and what he wants to accomplish. Instead he bashes Democrats, he calls himself a Reagan Republican (Does this mean more arms trade with Iran? Or will it be more Jelly-beans in his office?). Don’t get me wrong Ronnie Reagan did some amazing things but he wasn’t our greatest President. Again what does this mean to me a Utah citizen? Oh yeah nothing…

My favorite written assertion is this peach on what will happen if the Dems win:”After It will mean increased dependence on foreign oil, rising gas prices and falling moral standards.” Is foreign oil ripping us off different than the domestic’s ripping us off? Or falling moral standards? This seems ironic. I haven’t seen any moral standard in Congress in the last few years. We had Rep. Randy "Duke" Cunningham, an eight-term congressman sent to prison for “gasp” bribery, Mark Foley’s romp through the pages, Orin Hatch’s influence freeing of all things a convicted cocaine user from a middle eastern prison.

The point of the diatribe is to get politicians to do voters a favor. Focus on the facts of who you are, what you do, what are your values and how will you serve your constituents. Give us some information to make an informed decision because nothing else really matters.

Kudos to some of the local TV media for providing debates and forums for the candidates to provide us information as I have so enjoyed Orin Hatch stumbling on questions and wow Chris Cannon thanks for not answering basic simple questions from average Utahans. Cannon looked like an idiot. And sorry Pete Ashdown wow you didn’t convince me to vote for you despite my disdain for Hatch…

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Comments:
Why didn't Pete convince you? What else does he have to do to get your vote?
 
For what it is worth, when I see a "No Soliciting" sign while I'm out canvassing, I respect it and leave the house. Even though I'm not selling anything, I believe in privacy.
 
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